Trust

What is there to say about it that hasn't been said before. It's such a fragile thing and so easy to shred. When built up it can enrich lives and strengthen relationships. When taken away it can destroy a life, and respect that people have. Not just for the person that they lost the trust in, but in just about everyday life. Once it's gone, there could be a life time trying to earn it back.


There have been times that I was not a trust worthy person. I have lied and I have been less then a friend to the people I cared about. Maybe that is why that I had felt that when the person that I trusted most broke my trust in them. Or maybe it was the thought that since I was so untrusted, that I didn't deserve a trusting friend. So my paranoia and suspicions pushed them away, & caused them to break my heart.

I have lost friends, loved ones, people who I thought I had forever. People who could no longer be there because I at that time was not a good friend to them. Love should not be unconditional, and it isn't. Our friends and loved ones are not our puppies, who will forgive us no matter what. We should always know that what we have is fragile and should never be taken for granite. As fast as we can lie to someone, that someone can walk out that door.

Today in my current life, I'm blessed with friends, family, and an awesome boyfriend, who is probably the most honest person that I have ever met. Even when he tells me something that I may not like, I trust that he will always be open with me. This didn't happen right away, but with help and time, I am learning to trust in people again. I have given him my heart and I am trusting that he will take very special care of it.

Do I miss my old friends, and loved ones? Of course I do. My mom said that when you truly love someone, you never stop loving them. Whether it's past relations, lost family, or that best friend from school. You learn to live life with out them, but you will always miss them. I hope that in my future endeavors I've learned from my past. Hope that I can be a better friend, a better daughter, mother, and Aunt to all that I love. Striving one day, that someone will want to call me his wife. With that I of course hope to be a better wife to this person.

They say that perfection in unrealistic. I would like to think that "trying" for it isn't